{THE UNCHERISHED}

Sunday, July 31, 2005

today. went church. talked about HOMOSEXUALITY during service. whoah~ the speaker showed us pictures of GAYS and how they are real amongst us people. well. it's all around. face it. that's reality.whether you like it or not. just hoping that we can reach out to them. giving them a hand, a chance to turn back to what God has created them to be. so we should not condemn them.
after church. me, rach, kh and aaron went to lot one to have lunch and our study group. went macs. den to the library. had an unusual encounter. what a coincidence.
it had something to to with the topic we had for service. so we STUDIED for 2 hours.
*hey!! at least i did* so i got a lift frm kh's parents back home ... a big THANK YOU to them. notice it's to THEM!!!

hmMm. thinking about him today. actually. i think about him everyday. anyways.
gtg le. leaving my grandpa's place.
although it may seem impossible... but im sure we can overcome all barriers!!

blonk` blonk` blonk`

8:19 PM
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Saturday, July 30, 2005

im feeling feverish right now.
i think i'm falling sick. AGAIN.
i guess it was the durians' fault.
hope to get well soon. gotta go church tmr.

blonk` blonk` blonk`

11:31 PM
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hmMm.
romance??
sometimes you want it. but there are times that u don't. yes. i want to fall in love. madly in love. but what can i say. im just afraid things will turn out bad. or in simple terms. im afraid to commit. it seems easy to me before. when i see all my friends around me attached, i thought that it would be lovely to get someone that you love and spend time together. but then again. how much time can you spend with each other??
there's 24 hours a day. let's say you have 5 hours of sleep and you spend 10 hours in school. that's 15 hours off the clock, which leaves us with 9 hours left. minusing the time you spend on the road travelling from one place to another .. in a bus that is... that's another 2 hours. leaving us with 7 hours. setting aside 2 hours of time to study. that's 5 hours left. and the time you bathe, eat. that's about another 1 hour. now we're down to 4 hours.
so. on the average .. we can spend 4 hours a day together. that's not much.
in one year ... 365 days. a total of 8760 hours. we only spend 1460 hours together.
that's not the END. we still have to minus off days when we are sick, when we are having our exams, when we are busy with school, when we spend time with our own family and of course when we quarrel~
that's not much time left for the both of us. so how can we overcome the barrier of time to be with one another??? living in a country like Singapore... all we do is just work. there's hardly any time left.

but heyzZ. im still waiting for love to come knocking on my door. and i won't stop till i get some.
gtg...

blonk` blonk` blonk`

10:48 PM
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Friday, July 29, 2005

well.. nothing much happened.
at least not for yesterday..
amy and hayden came over to do the test tube thingy.
tt girl ar... forever ditch me on the way to skool... sms-ing me saying that i have to go to skool ALONE because she had to go late for some reason.
i wonder WHAT is it man. sheesh.
so we met up with hayden at the sji busstop. I SAW THE ACS BARKER GUY THERE!!! he smiled at me before at the bus stop in the morning to skool. and AMY WAS NOT THERE AGAIN FOR WHO KNOW'S WAD REASON. but anyways... he's just another eye candy. u must know. there's nothing to see and gossip juicily abt in skool u know. hee hee.
tt's not the point. anyways. so they came over and we cooked spaghetti. did the test tube thingy. hahs. they left at about 7.45pm. i got cuts on my toes~!!! thanks. it's not pain ... but if they hadn't come over... i would not have cut my toe.*and hand too!!!* if you don't believe mee... come and find me and i'll show it to ya~
had fun tho'
amy was telling me about splitting her boyfriend ... hayden ... with me.
and i get the horny side of him ... and she takes the gentleman side of him.
i was totally DISGUSTED. really. i was. how can someone share their boyfriend just like that. but anyways. it was a JOKE. she didn't mean it. hahs.
i talked some sense into her thick head. she has been soOo SLOW ever since she gone out with him. man... i used to be the slow one and she'll be nagging at me. boy~ now it's my turn to do that to her.
hee hee~
an analogy *that i told amy once* ... thinking that im a fishing rod and she's the BAIT ... if she gets pulled in to far ... i'll reel her in fast."
oh wells. it's stupid. i know it is.

hmMm..im gonna start writing my songs.
my previous posts are like drafts of it.
ideas of wad i want it to be like.
but it also has a meaning to it.
i wrote abt MY life. it's personal. VERY. well ... only my close fren's know about it.
hee hee~
gtg already.
hafta get prepared for later.

blonk` blonk` blonk`

6:38 PM
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this goes out to all the people who goes to church... especially those who are from my church and is reading my blog this very instant.

hillsong's concert on the 5th Aug 2005.
at the SINGAPORE INDOOR STADIUM.
time ... at night ...not sure. must go check.
if ur going .... msg me!!!!
must!!!

-------------------

TO THOSE WHO DID NOT REPLY MY MSG TODAY ...
PLS DO REPLY NEXT TIME AND NOT MAKE ME WAIT LIKE AN IDIOT JUST TO GET A REPLY.
BE MORE CONSIDERATE ... I DO NOT WANT TO WASTE MY MONEY AND TIME SMS-ING PPL WHO WON'T REPLY IT.
IT'S NOT EASY TO ORGANISE SUCH AN OUTING THAT IS SOoO BIG U KNOW!!!

BLONK` BLONK` BLONK`.

6:17 PM
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Wednesday, July 27, 2005

im going crazy. crazy for you.

can someone help me please?? can YOU help me??

9:40 PM
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just wanna let the wHOLe world know.

let them know that i'm ... THINKING OF YOU.

if only you knew that this post is for you.

for you to know what i'm feeling at this very moment.

is it that difficult to talk to me??

or is it that i'm just ... ... ...

when you're playing ball, when i picture you sitting in class. just makes me want

you more and more. the more you talk, the less i fear. at least i know. wherever i

go, a part of you will be staying here. here in this fragile heart of mine.

ever wonder what dreams are made off?? for me ... it's you.

9:09 PM
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i just feel so happy today. i have no idea why. asking myself this question over and over again just makes my head ache. ALOT. is it thinking about him that made me live through each and evry single day with a glimmer of hope??? or is it just because it's only a few more days till i see him again??
i know it may sound cliché but i have to admit ... seeing him smile brightens up my day; seeing him glance my way makes my heart skip a beat. but does he know how i feel? how i feel towards him? i hadn't realise this before. until i had taken that big step in my life. up there, i notice u noticing me ... but do u notice me noticing u too?? i can't help but think. think of wad is going through your mind. it seems as though u have alot to tell me, but is this assumption i have made wad i think it would be? if it's not what i think it would be, then i'll only be happy when i see you smiling. to see you laughing makes my heart feel at ease. at least i know that you are happy.
i can still remembered that very day when we communicated for that very first time. but it is very disheartening to know that that was also our last. but holding on to this memories makes my life very memorable. to reminisce the past that is filled with these happiness, makes life worth living on. hoping and desiring for a new and brighter future. hoping that it would be spent with you ... ... ...

8:20 PM
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Monday, July 25, 2005

today skool ended at 1030h.
azleen didn't collect the lit hw. jan didn't force us to hand in our work. physics was boring. the canteen was close during recess. and i sharon goh just gave out worksheets and did oral with us. well. she called on me but i was so blur until she had to call someone else. HAOWEN. sorry gal. just din know wad to say.
when it was time to go ...
me and jessica hadn't decided where to go. we din go town--too crowded.
bukit panjang plaza--too boring.
so we went to causeway point.
ate alot of food ... was so stuffed.
we wanted to study. but yoshi was like soOo comfortable that we could just slp there and forget abt studying. decided to walk around and buy cutee stuffs.
i ended up buying a WINNIE THE POOH pen. KAWAII ne!~
hahs.
walked and walked. window shopping. it was nice of her to follow me around. so i treated her to crystal jade's LAO PO BING!!! she didn't eat it before. man~ how sad to miss out on such a delicacy. felt so honoured to have introduced that to her. it was nice.!! whee. so we went off at abt 4plus. intending to go home and slp. so we took 187. she dropped of one stop after the interchange that we left and i sat it all the way till plaza. i wanted to find a colouring book and a WORD SEARCH book. ended up buying a word search book. gonna finish it in like dunno how many days. soon maybe. ohHh wells. den now im here on the com. blogging. waiting for my mum to come back from her temp work. she finishes at 6. whee~
now i can use the com before she comes home!!! yay.

5:23 PM
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Sunday, July 24, 2005

yesterday. went to skool for speech day cum the celebration to kick start the skool's 50th anniversary. i didn't want to go. i felt real sick. but our skool had forced us to at least purchase 5 bucks worth of coupons.and if i didn't go ... i'll have to produce an MC ... and mr lee boon keng had said quote only MCs are allowed if u were not to turn up on SPEECH DAY. parents' letter will be rejected!! unquote so not wanting to waste my money ... buying the coupon and my MC.
i decided to go for it. had fever during the prize giving. haowen was like. denyse!! why is your face so red. so i guess it was like really high le. was sick for the entire day. but i still walked arnd skool with amy ... got myself a henna.$1.50 only. amy had a name with a star. she had it for free.. bargained with this tamil jR.
went for worship prac. watched lame movies on amos's laptop. went home. slacked. saw my older brother before he left for taiwan. he's gone for 3 weeks man! hahs. no one fight with me.! yay!
--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=

okay. went for breakfast with amy and hayden today. went off to church half and hour later.
so i did worship today..so everything went fine. blah blah blah. took holy communion. rach seemed like she was in a bad mood.hmMM.i wished i knew. but i won't force her if she didn't want to tell... i respect her privacy. YES I DO!!! hahs. tt's wad frens are wad... hee hee~
welll. besides tt. it seems to be a habit. going there to seem him. wanting to see him. hahs. my eye candy~ hee hee~ i hope this ends real soon... i mean seriously. REAL SOON. it's like getting outta hand. it's became soOO bad tt i wanna see him more often ... i know i sound crazy. i do~ so i'll like pile myself with work and more work. trying not to think about it.
but engrossing in my skool work isn't gonna be there permanently. like when im going to bed. sleeping. man. tt's why i want it to go soon. if he's not gonna ask me to be his ... den i WANT IT TO GO!!
seem to me like im crazy. very. but the main thing is tt i wanna score for my O's. i wanna do biomedical in ngee ann.
i hope evrything goes fine. ppl arnd ... r/ship with others... results. basically.. just life. ive had too many downs in my life. i hope tt more ups will be in stored for me in the NEAR future.

to my GLASSDUCKS: i <33 u guyss..!! cant wait to perform together soon!!!
ppl reading this.. u must .. i say u MUST ... SUPPoRT US!!!!!!!!!
WHEE~
there. im finished with this.

blonk` blonk` blonk`

5:57 PM
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Sunday, July 17, 2005

sighzZz.
waiting for my aunt to pick me and my brother's up to the wedding dinner tonight. thanks to my cousin~ for going to tuition ...
gtg...
byee~

7:28 PM
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Saturday, July 16, 2005

YIPPEE!!!!
im finally able to use the com... my mum's not home and my 2 IRRITATING brothers are out. tt leaves me here to use the com. so .. life has had its ups and downs. many. things are working out pretty ok for me. it all started on sat last week when i quarrelled with my mum. she was being sOo unreasonable. i get scolded for studying, playing... basically scolded for anything that goes wrong in the house~ the next day, i was suppose to be in church earlier than usual as we had to rehearse theh dance steps for tt day.
it was YOUTH SUNDAY.
so my mum gave me a lift to church. in the car ... i reminded her that i'll be home late at night that day. she was like shocked to hear that i'll be home late. soOo she was like YOU CAN'T GO FOR THE CONCERT TONIGHT!!! i felt so cheated. she said i could go to my fren's concert and now she's telling me not to go??? i had already given my fren my word that i'll go. i was soOo angry ... i tried negotiating with her .... saying that i won't go for sg if she had let me go for the concert. no. she just have to reject the idea. good thing for me was that church wasn't very for from my house. so i alighted her car, not bothering to even say goodbye.
in church,
we practiced and practiced. the time came when we had to perform. it turned out fine. kh's musical was HILARIOUS~ after church. me rach and rene went PS to take NEOPRINT ... and study at BK. where we awaited the arrival of jason for like 3hours.
thanks ar!!! my butt hurt like crazy~ after walking around, they came over to my place. i was hoping that my mum would relent and let me go in the end.
but my mum wasn't home.
she din even bother picking up her fone.
so i decided to go. i was bathing when she called. screamed at me non-stop. yeah, i cried. so what?? i got changed and evrything and just when we were wearing our shoes, she came home. she told me off in front of my frens. but i dun care. it happens all the time. so i went.
was gonna be late.
so we took cab from KAP. jason paid. watched the concert. it was FANATASTIC!!! love it alot.
now i understand why their set piece was like soOo good. unlike my choir.
well.
school sucks. i din get the colours award. so much for letting me fill in the nomination paper ... might as well not give it to me. waste my ink and my foto. i wonder who's the one who din approve me. oh wells. i only wanted it for the money. if there is any. im not thinking of going to a jc. i wanna go ngee ann poly. i want to do biomedical!!!hahs. yes. tt's wad i wanna do.
soOo. tt shall be it.
=====
sighzZz. sometimes i wonder why im sucha loser. nothing seems to go right.
i used to hate being me. hated myself alot. but now. im only walking the way CHRIST wants me to. i put my life in his hands. soOo now i can let go of all my burdens and live my life to the fullest.!!!
yay!!!
well .. i shld stop blogging le.
byeee~

blonk` blonk` blonk`

1:01 PM
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